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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28711536">Such pretty forks in the road</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Loki_Slytherin/pseuds/Loki_Slytherin'>Loki_Slytherin</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M, Genderfluid, Genderfluid Loki (Marvel), Hurt Loki (Marvel), Jotunn Loki (Marvel), Loki (Marvel) Needs a Hug, M/M, Protective Tony Stark, Rape Aftermath, Slavery, The Author Regrets Everything, The Author Regrets Nothing, Tony Stark Has A Heart</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 10:06:52</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Rape/Non-Con</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>8,949</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28711536</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Loki_Slytherin/pseuds/Loki_Slytherin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Loki is sentenced to slavery after his attack on New York. The problem is, he's innocent. Withh the exception of Tony, the other avengers ignore his please for help.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Loki &amp; Tony Stark, Loki/Thor (Marvel), Loki/Tony Stark</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>71</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Smiling</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Authors note: this story is really dark. It contains semi graphic non con, slavery, suicide references, suicidal thoughts, gender dysphoria, self harm and eating disorders. I may include drug and alcohol abuse as well.</p><p>Also it will be very gay. And Loki is genderfluid. Apparently that requires a warning, so if your a homophobe, don't read. Loki uses the pronouns of the gender he is at that moment in my Story, so sorry if that gets confusing.</p><p>The Story is set just after Avengers Assemble.</p><p>All the characters belong to Marvel. The name of the story title is an Alanis Morrisette album, and all the chapters will also be named after her songs.</p><p>Loki bit down into the muzzle. The muzzle dug into his skin, controlling him. He gazed down at the floor, tears threatening to leak out of his eyes. He cautiously pulled at the shackles binding his hands behind his back, pulling not to get free, merely to give himself a distraction. The eyes of everyone around him haunted him, tormented him, humiliated him. The eyes of the people he knew, the people he loved, all of them filled with hate and disappointment and disgust.</p><p>Once Loki has walked up to the front, to the floor in front of Odin, the guards remove the muzzle. Loki looks up at Odin, and Thor, and Frigga. He can see anger filling Odin's eyes, hate filling Thor's eyes, and disappointment filling Frigga's eyes. He can take the anger. He can take the hate. But the disappointment filling Frigga's eyes cuts into him, threatening to consume him with self hate.</p><p>He already hates himself. He should have been stronger. He should have been able to stop the stone controlling his mind, filling him with rage, telling him what to do. It wasn't his fault, but he feels like it was.</p><p>"Loki Laufeyson!" Odin booms. Loki cannot help but shrink back. The use of the surname fills him with pain. He grew up an Odinson. To have his father announce the name of his Jotun father announces one thing very clearly: Odin no longer wishes to associate himself with Loki.</p><p>"You are brought here today for the crimes of having started a war against Midgard. You opened a portal and allowed monsters to attack. On Midgard they consider you a war criminal. You brought wide spread destruction, and caused many casualties. The evidence against you is almost overwhelming. Do you deny that it was you who tried to take over Earth?" Odin bellows.</p><p>"No. I don't deny that I was there. But I was being controlled. The sceptre contains a stone. When Thor caught me, and took the sceptre, my mind cleared. I couldn't help it. Please, father, please, I didn't want this! You have to believe me." Loki begged. He could feel his breath getting shaky, could feel panic starting to overwhelm him. He fought down the icy cold fear that gripped around his lungs.</p><p>"You were mind controlled? So the god of lies cannot kick his habits. Well I'm afraid your silver tongue won't get you out of this trap, not unless you have solid evidence." Odin says.</p><p>"You can look at my memories. Please. Look at my memories and you'll see. I had no choice. I didn't want to. I swear. Father, please, I'm begging you." Loki says desperately. Odin didn't believe him. Odin thought he was too blame. Odin was going to sentence him. Loki fought to contain his fear as he gazed up at his once called family.</p><p>This shouldn't have been his fate. This wasn't how he was supposed to live. There comes a time, Loki realized, when one comes to a split in the path. A fork in the road. Where from that moment, a choice must be made, and that choice will affect everything. Loki's split in the path had been when he let go of Thor's hand. When he tried to kill himself. When he let himself fall backward into the abyss. He craved death then, as he craved mercy now. Such a pretty fork in the road, always so pretty. So innocent, yet so harmful. If only he hadn't let go.</p><p>"Silence! You are no son of mine! I raised you as mine, I loved you as mine! Even though you were a monster, a jotun, the creature which so often attacks us! I gave you a chance, and like all of your species you betray me, you break my trust! I regret not leaving you there to die!" Odin yells. Loki shrinks back and feels a guard hit the back of his legs. Loki sinks to his knees and lowers his head.</p><p>"I hereby find you guilty! You are sentenced to as life of servitude. You will have no access to your magic, save what your master will explicitly order you too use! And as your crimes were so great, as your acts so horrendous, as your betrayal of our family so disgusting, I hereby state that you are enslaved to Thor! May he do as he sees fit with you, and may you be grateful for such mercy!"</p><p>Loki tries not to let the tears fall down his face as a collar is placed around his neck. He shivers as the guards haul him to his feet and unshackle him. One of the guards traces a finger across his cheekbone. Loki shivers in disgust and tries to pull away.</p><p>Thor walks down to Loki and angrily grabs his shirt. Loki tries not to pull away as Thor drags him down to Midgard.</p><p>The avengers are surprised by the punishment, but they all seem to think it fitting. Captain America takes great delight in watching as Loki must do anything Thor asks. Bruce watches with a grim fascination. Hawkeye laughs at Loki's distress. Even Natasha seems to take pleasure in Loki's humiliation. Tony alone seems a little uncomfortable, and leaves to his room early in the evening.</p><p>Much later on, when all the others have left, Loki and Thor are alone together. This was the time Loki had been dreading. This was the moment Loki found out whether or not Thor would be merciful, whether or not Loki would stand any hope of keeping his remaining dignity.</p><p>"Undress." Thor commands simply, and Loki is once again filled with despair.</p><p>"Thor. Please. Your my brother. This isn't right." Loki whispers, eyes filled with shame, tears rolling down his cheeks already. Thor steps forward, and Loki realises he has already undressed. Thor raises a hand, and slaps Loki in the face. Loki stumbles backward, limply raising a hand to his stinging face. He knows that by tomorrow a bruise will have formed.</p><p>"You are not brother. Not in blood, and not in name. You are a jotun, a freak, a monster, a criminal and my slave! You will only address me as master, and you will never refer to us as siblings. Undress, now, or this night will be ten times worse for you. Oh and Loki, no need to look so glum. I want you to smile, Loki, keep on smiling"</p><p>silently, tears pouring down his glossy face, Loki undresses and kneels before his master.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Ablaze</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It had been three weeks since they had defeated Loki. Three weeks since Thor had taken Loki to Asgard to face justice. At the time, Tony had thought Asgardian justice would be fair. He thought Loki would receive a just trial and a fair imprisonment. He thought Loki wouldn't be sold into slavery.</p><p>Something about Loki's fate just didn't sit right for Tony. Something about slavery. Something about they way that the disgraced god had rapidly lost weight, dark shadows had appeared beneath his eyes and he was permanently covered in bruises.</p><p>And Tony was shocked by how little the other avengers seemed to care. Even Bruce, usually the kindest avenger, the avenger with the strongest morals, seemed to think Loki deserved what he got. Even Natasha, who had killed in the past had no mercy to give to the fallen god.</p><p>Tony felt as though he was growing apart from the others. He couldn't join in with their tormenting Loki, he couldn't bring himself to do it. He tried, the firs few evenings, to sit there with them, to try and see where they were coming from. But every time he looked at Loki, he saw the same expression. A closed off expression. An expression that begged for help. And Tony couldn't sit through that.</p><p>Tony walked into the library. He needed some peace and quiet, and he didn't want to spend another five minutes in his room. What Tony really wanted was the avengers before Loki had come along, the avengers that had been heroes. He wanted everything to go back to when he was the worst, when he had the least morals. As he walked in to the library he notices a small figure sat against the bookshelf. Loki.</p><p>Tony looks over to him, and winces when he sees Loki's face. A sharp cut dances across Loki's cheekbones, and he has a black eye. Tony cannot help but feel that Loki resembles a trapped animal, a frightened child. Tony watches as Loki stands up, a small groan escaping from his lips. Tony watches as Loki turns around and spots Tony.</p><p>"I'm sorry. Forgive me for not noticing your arrival." Loki stutters, dropping to his knees. He sounds terrified, sounds nothing like the Loki that had tried to take over New York, nothing like the Loki that had mocked him. This is a frightened person, to scared to put even a toe out of line. Loki looks up cautiously and meets Tony's eyes. Loki's eyes glow green, the fire in them ablaze, a clarity that hadn't been there before.</p><p>Tony turns away. The green eyes. Ablaze with fire. Not cloudy. Green eyes. Not blue. Not the same blue that everyone under the mind control had. The blue that Loki's eyes had been when he lead the attack.</p><p>It took a lot of swallowed anger for Tony to ask Thor if he could borrow Loki that evening. Thor had presumed some things that made Tony very sick. Tony had nodded a numb agreement to everything Thor had said, including a lot of drivel like "Finally come to your senses and realized Loki ain't a hero then?" that made Tony frustrated. But he had to agree. He had to swallow his anger.</p><p>Dinner is a tense affair for Tony. They sit around on the couches in the lounge, and Loki brings them the food and the drinks. Tony watches Loki cautiously. He tries not to let the others notice, although he is not sure he is totally perfect at it. Loki is limping and seems to be in a great deal of pain, although he hides it well.</p><p>After dinner, Tony goes to his workshop and messes around with bits of metal. He is too tense though, to frustrated.</p><p>When he goes into his room, he is surprised to see Loki kneeling on the floor. The frightened slave looks up as he enters and briefly meets his eyes. Tony sees resignation and dread mingling in Loki's eyes. Tony doesn't know how to approach the subject, doesn't know how to talk to Loki. He isn't used to words, isn't good with feelings.</p><p>"Loki go sit on the bed or something." Tony says. Loki stands up and sits on the bed, and Tony can see just how much he's trembling. He tries to hide his fear, but he's not really successful about it.</p><p>"Lokes, I'm going to ask a couple of questions, and I need you to be honest okay?" Tony says firmly. Loki nods. "Your eyes were blue when you attacked. Were you attacking of your own free will?" Tony asks. He cautiously sits down next to him on the bed, trying to ignore they way Loki flinches every-time he moves.</p><p>"No. I was being controlled by the sceptre. When Thor took it I gradually regained control of my mind." Loki says. "I tried to tell Odin but he said I was lying. What would you like me to do, Master?" Loki sounds scared still, resigned but scared.</p><p>"What would I like you to do?" Tony repeated. Despite being a genius he could sometimes be dumb. "Don't call me master. You look tired Loki, lie down. Try to rest, I will keep you safe."</p><p>Loki shudders and lies down. He makes no effort to pull the blanket over himself, he does not shut his eyes or relax at all. Instead he just lies there, clearly expecting something bad to happen.</p><p>"Can I ask you something personal? If you don't want to answer just ignore me." Loki nods stiffly "Does Thor require you to do things with him like- I don't know how to ask this." Tony trails off, uncomfortable. "Does Thor rape you?"</p><p>Tony does not miss the shudders that course through Loki's body. He does not miss the way that Loki flinches. He does not miss the shame that fills Loki's eyes. He does not miss the way Loki reacts.</p><p>"Yes mast- sir." Loki replies. "Him, and Mr Rogers, and Mr Barton."</p><p>"Steve and Clint too? I thought they were straight." Tony says. He thought Thor might have, he had suspicions about what Thor was doing but he thought that the others had no idea. He thought if he could tell them the truth they would side with him.</p><p>"I can change my sex at will if they allow me." Loki murmured. "My gender changes uncontrollably. When I was free I would change my sex to match. They desire me as a woman."</p><p>"Loki. I am going to do everything in my power to keep you safe. That is a promise." Tony said, and he realised that he meant it.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Reasons I drink</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Loki lowered his eyes as Tony made the promise to keep him safe. No one could keep him safe, no one except perhaps Odin and Thor, neither of whom wanted to keep him safe, but that didn't mean he didn't appreciate the offer. The sheets on Tony's bed were consuming him, enveloping him, surrounding him with warmth and comfort. He almost allowed himself to relax. Tony walked over and sat down on the bed.</p><p>"Shit." Tony said. "I don't know how to help you. I don't know how to stop what's going on. I thought if it was just Thor, once I told them what he was doing we could all fight for you. What can I do for you? Anything, Lokes, anything at all?" Tony sounded tense, he sounded sorrowful, he sounded tired. Loki recognized Tony's tone well. It was the one he himself used.</p><p>"Tony… can I call you Tony?" Tony nodded. "You are doing everything fine. You haven't done anything wrong at all. There is nothing you can do. Nothing anyone can do." Loki said in an even tone.</p><p>"Jarvis, get us some drinks." Tony said. Tony shuffled across the bed and laid down next to Loki. Loki felt himself stiffen a little but tried to force himself to relax. Tony had said he would keep him safe. And even if Tony was going to take him, being stiff would only cause more discomfort. Far better to allow his muscles to go soft, to stop his body fighting, to just give into the pain.</p><p>For a second, Loki was horrified by his own thoughts.</p><p>After a couple of minutes of awkward silence, the door opened and a robot came in and promptly dropped a tray containing several large bottles of various forms of alcohol. As the robot left them alone, Loki wondered how Tony could possibly be expected to consume all of that. Even a god would struggle with that much, but surely a human could not survive that high an intake.</p><p>"Why do you drink so much?" Loki asked, fully expecting a slap for his rather rude question. Sometimes he forgot who he was now. Sometimes his tongue spilled words out, rather against his will. Loki hoped that habit would disappear soon, it got him in trouble rather too frequently.</p><p>"Why do I drink so much? I don't drink that much, Loki, Jarvis just brings me choices. But the reasons I drink are too cope. After what happened when I got captured, after every life I've seen killed, after watching what happened to you, I guess I just need a distraction. I need the ability to tell everyone I am fine, even though I am not. I need the ability to keep it all together."</p><p>Loki thought that sounded reasonable. Sounded like something that made sense. Something that had he been freed after attacking Midgard he probably would have done. Something that he needed to cope with guilt. Tony poured Loki a glass of something and Loki carefully drank it, liking the way it burned his throat. To forget, that was another reason, Loki realised.</p><p>"Can I hold you?" Tony asked. Although all Tony wanted was to comfort the trembling prince, Loki misunderstood.</p><p>"You do not need my permission to do anything to me." Loki said, a touch of poison lacing his voice, as unintentional as his role in taking over Midgard.</p><p>"No, Loki I didn't mean like that. I wanted to hug you, just to make sure that was it. Hug, just a hug, would that be okay with you?" Tony asked, and Loki nodded his consent, unwilling to be touched, but unable to reply no. Tony rolled over and pulled Loki into a hug.</p><p>Loki tried to control his breathing. He could feel Tony's arms around him and they felt constricting. He choked down a gasp of fear and forced himself to relax. After a while he began to enjoy the hold. There was something comforting in the steady grasp.</p><p>At around ten, Loki knew he had to leave. He had been safe as could be, but if he did not return to Thor he would be punished most severely. He got up, detaching himself from Tony's arms. It seemed to him that Tony was already asleep, which surprised Loki, he would have thought that Tony probably stayed awake fir a long time.</p><p>Loki walked downstairs in a daze. He tried not to think of Thor, only to focus on Tony. No one had ever cared about him like Tony did. He had had lovers, but they all wanted him for his power. He had never known someone to do something as subtle as just holding him, believing him, comforting him.</p><p>Thor didn't ask Loki what had happened in Tony's chambers, he clearly did not care. He merely ordered Loki to undress and then lie down on the bed and be quiet. Loki got undressed as quickly as he could, discarding his clothes like a chocolate being unwrapped. Loki tried to let his body go limp as he laid down, feeling Thor's hands all over his back.</p><p>Loki felt tears pour down his cheeks. He tried to zone out, to stop himself from feeling. Perhaps that would make it more bearable. Thor repulsed Loki, they way his once called brother touched him made him sick to the core. The way Thor used him as a toy. As Thor raped him, Loki felt his mind black out. But before he passed out completely, he thought once of Tony.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Diagnosis</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Tony woke up the morning after his conversation with Loki feeling exhausted and sickened, and most of all disappointed in those he had considered friends. Tony had become dissalusioned with those he had considered friends.</p><p>Tony walked out of his room. He had to find a way to help Loki. Now that his suspicions had been confirmed, he could not pretend. He felt like a patient having recieced a terminal diagnosis. He knew that to pretend everything was fine, to go about his life as though nothing had happened, thear would be a truly despicable, a truly heartless act.</p><p>Tony knew he wasn't great at figuring out solutions. He may be a genius, but his brains lay with technology, not with planning ways out of dead ends. He had no idea how to even begin. He had no idea of the kind of magic preventing Loki from leaving, if there even was magic of the kind.</p><p>The only thought that have Tony any relief was that the other avengers were even worse at anything involving brains. It was Tony's as if yet invoiced opinion that the other avengers had the combined brain cells of a cucumber.</p><p>It was with a mission that Tony walked downstairs, a mission that he would get away. He would come up with a plan. He had to. For Loki, for justice, for truth, for human rights, for equality. Tony had to get Loki out of hell, because otherwise he would never be able to consider himself anything but a monster.</p><p>Tony walks downstairs, the rough stone floor cold beneath his bare feet. His grubby sports trousers feel fragile, and Tony could swear the tower is colder than usual. His shirt sticks to him, and he feels slightly feverish. It feels as though some for of uncontrollable magic is loose in the tower, as though something out if the ordinary is going on.</p><p>Tony walks into the main hall. The other avengers sit around on the couches, drinking coke and coffee like nothing has changed. Natasha is sat practically in Bruce's lap, the two are not even hiding their affection. Steve and Clint are watching the TV, were a match of football is being shown. Thor is sat down with Loki by his feet. His hands are in Loki's hair, all over it, playing with the fine dark strands. Anyone can see Loki is uncomfortable with it, and Tony hates himself as he does not speak up. Tony also notices that Loki has the body of a woman today.</p><p>"Is it me, or is it especially cold? Perhaps the heating is broken." Natasha comments, her eyes still glued to Bruce. Tony doesn't usually care about the open affection, all the avengers were known to bring home a variety of people, men and women alike, to warm their beds. But for some reason, today the sight of them makes him feel angry.</p><p>"My heating is never broken." Tony says with a huff. He built the tower. He designed all the technology. It is his money that pays the bills. It is all his. The others don't pull their weight, How dare they insult his dignity as well?</p><p>"Ladies, gentlemen. I have a simple solution." Thor said, the false grace in his voice sounding almost poisonous. "Loki can use their magic to heat up the tower." as Thor suggested it, Loki tensed and slumped backward as Thor pulls his hair.</p><p>"Thor, please. My magic would be stronger if you'd only let me-" Loki whispers, but is cut short by a firm slap in the face. Loki lowers their eyes to the ground and Tony notices how glum they look.</p><p>"I'm causing the cold." Loki whispers. "I am not in control. My powers are trying to protect me, to make me feel safer. I'm sorry. Please, Thor, don't hurt me any more. One night, one night is all I need. If I can have that, I could manage to get back in control. Please don't punish me more, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."</p><p>"Enough!" Thor bellows. "How dare you make us uncomfortable!"</p><p>"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I can't help it, I'm trying, I really am." Loki whispers. The tremor in his voice betrays how scared he is, his whole body is shaking, he seems terrified.</p><p>"Stand up." Thor said angrily. Thor walked out of the room for a second and comes back in holding manacles and a whip. Loki tenses and shivers some more, but doesn't move. Thor walks over to the wall and pins the shackles there, and clicks his fingers at Loki, clearly signalling for the fallen prince to walk over there. He locked Loki's hands into the shackles. Tony felt nothing but horror.</p><p>Thor ripped Loki's shirt away from their back, and swung the whip down hard. After 15 lashes, Loki stumbled slightly,, and slumped forward, all his weight against the shackles, unconscious.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Missing the miracle</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When Loki awoke he could tell he was in Thor's bedroom. He could tell by the smell of the room, which stank of unwashed body and sweat. Loki shuddered. His brothers lack of personal hygiene had always repulsed him.</p><p>Loki pulls himself to his feet and feels relief as he sees that Thor has allowed him to change his body to that of a man. Being a man stuck in the body of a woman had been hell. Loki had never had to experience gender dysphoria for long, usually as he felt his gender change he would shift his body to match.</p><p>Loki also feels extreme relief that the room is empty. His back is still on fire, agony still courses through his veins, and he still is not in total control of what little magic is still available to him. Loki pulls himself to sitting position. A small glass of water sits by his head along with a slice of bread. Thor must have decided to feed him. Loki downs the glass of water in one gulp, glad for the relief it brings to his aching throat.</p><p>Loki knows he should eat, but can't stomach the food. Loki walks out the room, tears still dried to his face. He slips into the bathroom and sinks to the floor. Waves of despair wash over him, threatening to drown him in the ocean of sorrow. He slumps backward against the bath and raises up the sleeve of his shirt. He might not be able to stop the pain others inflict on him, but he can choose to add more. And such a small choice might help him remain in control of his magic slightly more.</p><p>Loki focuses on his nails, forcing them to grow slightly longer. Longer and sharper. He scratches away at his skin, tearing the sensitive flesh. He crawls over to the cabinet and opens it, finding a razor in the pot. He pulls the blade out and brings it across his skin, relishing the way the blood spills out.</p><p>The door opens and Tony steps in.</p><p>"Shit shit shit." Tony says. "Loki? Are you okay?"</p><p>"Surprised you aren't laughing at me. You are missing the miracle, Tony, the miracle of a god hurting themselves. Willingly. that's a rare sight, you should probably be celebrating." Loki cannot keep the bitterness and pain out of his voice. He cannot disguise how much he wants to be alone.</p><p>"I cannot celebrate your pain. Come with me, we are going to clean you up. And then we are going to come up with a plan to save you." Tony said.</p><p>"Why? Why do you care about me? Can't you just let me die? I want to die, it would be a mercy at this stage. can't you just let me cut myself until one day I can't take it any-more?"</p><p>"Loki. I've grown to care about you, I can't let you die. that's not an option." Tony says, biting his nails. He places an arm around Loki and helps him to his feet, leading him out of the room.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Losing the plot</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Authors note: warning for homophobic language in this chapter. I can reclaim the slurs used.</p><p>Loki woke up feeling as though she were a woman. Gazing down at herself, she sees that as she slept her body had already shifted. Not to the gloriously curved woman Thor had made her be the other day, not to the Barbie like figure that Steve and Clint preferred, Loki had rarely desired bodies like that. Loki preferred women's bodies that were somewhat less desirable. Not ugly, not obese, not overly repulsive, just less curvaceous than the pornographic body desired by others.</p><p>Loki rubbed her tired eyes and walked out of Starks room. She had no idea of the time, after Stark had found her in the bathroom he had taken her into the bedroom and held her hand as she drifted into sleep. It was probably still midday, Loki expected that she had not slept more than a few hours. And if the day had been drawing to a close, Loki would have been summoned to Thor's bedroom.</p><p>Loki walked into the living room and sees Thor and Steve sat there watching TV. Again. The mortal entertainment captivated them to no end, enchanting them in a web of wonder. Loki winced in pain and lowered herself to the floor, sitting down. She does not want to be in the same room as Thor any longer, but there is little she can do to avoid it.</p><p>"Ah, Loki. My darling. Come here. Kneel in front of me." Thor commands idly.</p><p>"Yes master." Loki whispers, hating herself for how weak she is, hating herself for mindlessly obeying. But she has learnt her lesson, if she does not obey, pain is sure to follow. It is far easier to accept humiliation than pain. At first, pain is easier, but after a while, humiliation and submission are second nature. Wordlessly, silently, not daring to protest, Loki walks over to Thor and sinks to the ground by his feet, bowing her head slightly, letting her hair cover her eyes.</p><p>"Give me a foot massage." Thor commands, shuffling back into his seat. Loki gently picks up Thor's foot and takes off his socks, and begins to mover her palms over his feet, her skin smooth against his calloused. His feet are wet with sweat, almost slimy, and Loki cannot help but find this job gross. As she works she notices Thor getting hard, and she swallows down dread. She knows what will happen anyway, she is used to it by now, no use getting upset.</p><p>"Lie down on the sofa now." Thor says, "Naked." Loki is shocked. Not by the command, but by where. Surely even Thor does not mean to have what he desires out here, in front of everyone?</p><p>"Here?" Loki asked, bile rising in her throat. God, she does not want this. For everyone to be able to see her in all her shame. For anybody to just be able to walk in whenever, doing what they desired. For Tony to be able to see her like this, at her very lowest.</p><p>"Yes here." Thor snaps, slapping her hard in the face. "Scared someone's going to walk in? you've slept with everyone in the tower already you little slut! you're a whore, Loki, and you know it. A fag too, because you enjoy being fucked like a girl! I could never let anyone do that to me. But you, you like it. You enjoy it. You're a perverted fag and a freaky little whore. that's all you are and all you ever will be. So tell me, Loki, what is it that you fear about doing this out here? Scared someone else will see what a freak you are?"</p><p>"No master." Loki lies through gritted teeth, trying to ignore her fury at the slurs and insults hurled her way. "I merely thought you would not desire to be seen with me."</p><p>Thor looks disbelieving, but clearly doesn't actually care enough. He glares at Loki, and that is all she needs to see to get undressed, discarding her clothes on the floor. Wordlessly, tears rolling down her cheeks, unable to speak, unable to protest, unable to run away, she lays down on the sofa, or the couch, if she were American, and waits as Thor moves closer to her. He leans down on top of her, pushing his body onto hers.</p><p>Loki lets tears pour down her cheeks, but she barely has the strength to care. She knows she is losing grip on reality, losing her sanity, losing her dignity, losing the plot.</p>
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<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Reckoning</h2></a>
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    <p>Tony dropped the metal. "Shit." he mutters, bending down and picking up the rough metal, cold, sharp, and very definitely broken. Tony throws the metal onto the table in annoyance. He hasn't been successful with his inventions, not since he found out about Loki. His anger is preventing him from thinking. "Stupid fool," he mutters under his breath. he's turning into Thor or Steve, letting emotions prevent thoughts. Never a good combination. A rather Gryffindor like way of thinking,</p><p>Tony has always hated how emotions cloud judgement. They stop one thinking critically, they stop the ability to plan and focus, they prevent winning. And it seems, from this whole Loki issue, it prevents looking for the truth and justice. Tony frequently feels like he is the only one of the avengers who ever uses his brains. He is the Snape of the order of the phoenix, a slytherin in Gryffindor common room. God, if only they lived at Hogwarts, Tony reflects, giving Loki a sock would be rather easy.</p><p>Tony stumbles out of his workshop and walks upstairs in a very nearly blind rage. His frustration at his lack of ideas, motivation, and energy, combined with his stress about the Loki situation, added to the fact that he hadn't slept exactly well, was proving to be rather unfortunate. He felt like a pregnant woman, or a stroppy teen, completely unable to harness his emotions.</p><p>He walked upstairs and into the living room. The site which greeted him nearly made him pass out.</p><p>Thor, on top of Loki, raping Loki, hurting Loki, right there, in front of Steve, just where anyone could walk in. And Tony could tell Loki was distressed, tears poured down her pale cheeks, the silvery marks left behind sparkling like diamonds. Her hair was long and dark, partially covering her face, but not enough to hide her pained expression. Every few seconds small gasps of pain escape her lips.</p><p>Tony turns away, a mumble of curse words falling of his lips. Nothing could have prepared him for that sight. Part of him, the emotional part, wants to throw Thor and the others out of his tower, but the logical part of him says that should he do that Loki would be sure to suffer more.</p><p>"When your finished, send Loki to me." Tony mutters, loud enough to be heard, quiet enough to not betray the barely concealed anger in his voice. Tony walks up to his room and flops onto the bed. He needs to find away out of this. He needs to help Loki. The resolve within him grows stronger.</p><p>"One day, Thor, you will meet your reckoning. One day, I will make you pay. I swear it, on everything, on my life, on Pepper's life, on Earth, on Asgard, on every living thing." Tony mutters, loud enough to be classified as speaking aloud, quiet enough for no one to hear him. Tony flops back onto the bed and shuts his eyes, drifting into sleep.</p><p>When he awakes, Loki is there, gazing down at him with amusement flickering across her face. Tony jumps awake, blinking in surprise.</p><p>"Uh. You surprised me." he mumbles, sleepily, rubbing his eyes. "You could have woke me you know."</p><p>"Yeah. But your rather cute when you sleep. The angry expression is less present. You look younger, and happier." Loki replies, a memory of a smile teasing the corner of her mouth. She still looks sad, still looks hopeless and miserable, but Tony is thankful for the little bit of light he brings her.</p><p>"Sit down. If you want, its not an order." he says, patting the bed next to him, hoping Loki will sit. She looks exhausted, and like every step causes her pain. She looks at the bed for a second, and then seems to almost collapse onto the bed. Though her back remains rigid, she seems to relax somewhat.</p><p>"Tony, there's something I should probably tell you. I need to tell someone, I want to tell someone, and your the only person I can tell. I- I'm pregnant." as she spoke, Tony could tell just how distressed Loki was about the situation. Her voice trembled, and there was an edge of disgust.</p><p>"Oh." Tony was at a loss of words. He wanted to ask Loki how she knew, when she found out, if she was certain, how carrying a child even worked with her shifting sex. "Do you want to keep the child. If you do, I will help you. If you don't- which I totally understand- I will help you with dealing with that too."</p><p>"I don't know yet, I'm sorry. I only found out earlier, I had suspicions but I stole a test out of the basket in the bathroom- please don't tell any of the others about that- and it confirmed what I feared." Loki says, lowering her head, shifting nearer to Tony. Tony gently places an arm around her shoulder, pulling the fragile god into a gentle embrace.</p><p>"It could be a false positive." Tony says, wondering if Loki would prefer that.</p><p>"Its not. I can feel that its not. Its hard to explain, but I'm sure." Loki snuggles nearer, burying herself in Tony's body. She moves his arm around her tighter as though trying to block out the world. Tony feels a warm tingling feeling in his stomach, the childish feeling of a crush. no- more than a crush. Loki means something to him, he realizes, something more than his one night stands, more than even Pepper meant.</p><p>He loves Loki.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I don't know why the avengers would have pregnancy tests lying around tbh considering Natasha can't have children and the others are guys. Maybe one of the avengers had an Ex who left them there. Anyway, what do you think of the story so far?</p>
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<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Sandbox love</h2></a>
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    <p>Au: Warning for talk of miscarriage. Also, I have no idea what sandbox love means so I googled it, and I think this is used correctly.</p><p>After Loki had realized that they were pregnant, things had gone from awful, to worse. Loki was in constant pain, fear, dread, despair. Every move hurt them. Every breath was agony. Loki had almost lost the will to live.</p><p>After the nightly rapes, Loki had gotten into the habit of going to Tony's room. They suffered with Thor, with Steve, and with Clint, but at the end of it all they could just collapse into Tony's arms, tired beyond exhaustion, despairing beyond depression, lost and alone. Yet with Tony, Loki could rest, could sleep, could eat, could let their body heal. Tony's room became a safe space.</p><p>Loki was now three weeks pregnant. There was still a chance of miscarriage, higher in mortals than in gods, true. It was rare for an Asgardian to lose a child, even so early on in pregnancy, and although Loki did not know much of their Jotun heritage, they suspected that the frost giants would have an even lower risk.</p><p>It was in these three weeks that Loki had realized something. They cared about Tony. Perhaps not love, not yet, no, Loki was unsure whether they were even capable of true love. It was a complex set of feelings, more deep than platonic, more weak than true love. Perhaps it was just love, not true love, not platonic love, just regular old love.</p><p>Loki was more than aware that this was quick. Too soon to be in love. Not love at first sight exactly, not as quick and as certain as those Midgardian fairytale princesses, but no long growing love, no sandbox love either. This was, perhaps, a teenagers love. Brought about by situation, by a comforting hand in a moment of angst. Painful, scary, awkward. Precious, though, more precious than any gold Loki had ever wanted.</p><p>Loki wandered out into the hall, shivering as cold hit their skin. The clothes upon their back were little more than rags by now, easy to remove, easy to tear, easy to buy. Loki moved their hand and placed it across their stomach, a feeling of fear flashing across their mind whenever they think of the baby.</p><p>Loki walks onto the balcony outside. The cool air hits their face, bringing a stinging sense of numbness. A sense of relief, a sense of relaxation. Loki sinks to the floor, curling their legs up to their chin, resting their back against the wall.</p><p>"You okay their Bambi?" Tony asks, shocking Loki slightly. Loki trips, hastily jumping out of their musings and getting to their feet.</p><p>"Bambi? Yeah, I'm okay, I was just thinking about life." Loki has no idea what Bambi means but has no care left.</p><p>"Anything about life in particular? Anything I could help with?" Tony asks, pulling Loki into a gentle hold, rubbing their tense back, trying to get some of Loki's muscles to relax a little, perhaps giving the pregnant slave a minutes respite.</p><p>"I was thinking about you. And my mother. I think you might be the only people who care about me. Who have ever cared, I mean, I doubt my mother still cares. But mainly I was thinking of you, about how wonderful and perfect you are, about how you make me feel better. I don't think I'd be alive without you."</p><p>It is hard for Loki to confess that truth, because it feels wrong to say. Feels like it puts pressure on Tony to keep up the good work. Feels as though Tony might realize Loki had feelings for him, and might turn him out and chase him away. It feels to Loki as though they are confessing a great weakness, leaving themself bare and vulnerable to any attack. Feels to Loki as though they are giving their enemy the weapon needed to destroy them.</p><p>"Loki. I'm sure your mother cares about you greatly. She would listen to you right, and then she would hear of your innocence. And I care about you too, Loki, I do." Tony says, rubbing the gods shoulders as they begin to cry again, tears soaking Tony's shirt like sweat after a training exercise. After a while, Loki speaks up.</p><p>"I should probably go to Thor now. If I am not there when he wants me, he makes it worse, more painful, for me. Thank you, Tony, for everything." Loki slips away, walking of the balcony, trying to control the shaking in their legs. This won't be that bad, they have survived much worse at Thors hand. Tonight will be no different.</p>
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<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Her</h2></a>
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    <p>Tony took the shaking gods hand in his own. Loki looked worse than usual. Loki had tumbled into his room, covered in blood, tears, and some other stuff that Tony did not want to think about. Never mind that it was two in the morning, Tony had woken up and begun to care for the god any way he could.</p><p>From what Tony could gather, Thor had found out that Loki was pregnant.</p><p>"He said that its good, that it will continue the line." Loki had sobbed. "He says then he'll have to slaves. He wants my child, he wants to use them like he used me even though that child is probably his. I don't want that for them, Tony, I want my child to be happy and free." those had been the only intelligible words out of Loki's mouth. The rest had been a jumble of sob wrecked noises.</p><p>Tony had tried to comfort Loki but he had no idea how. There was one person left whom Tony knew who probably didn't hate him, one person left who might be able to comfort him, one person left whom Loki loved. Frigga. Perhaps, if he could contact her, Loki would cheer up. Perhaps with Frigga's help, Loki and is yet unborn child could be safe, and free, and even happy.</p><p>Tony had no idea how to contact Frigga. He barely knew who she was, let alone knew how to call her. But there had to be a way, and Tony had a suspicion.</p><p>"Loki, when mortals pray to you, can you hear them? And could you pray to another god?" Tony asked, wondering if Loki would catch on, wondering if he could be of any help. Even if he could get through to Frigga there would be no guarantee of her help, but surely it was worth a shot. Anything was worth a shot to protect Loki.</p><p>"Yes. At least before my powers were taken I could. But gods cannot pray to other gods. That would be pointless." Loki replied. Loki slumped backward suddenly, and Tony helped him to lie down. Loki was exhausted, even Tony, blind as usual to the feelings of others, could tell that much.</p><p>Five minutes later, Loki was asleep. Tony left the room, walking into the kitchen. The place around him was so familiar, so homely. He sank to his knees on the bare floor, and began to pray to Frigga. He prayed to her as he had never prayed before. For a while, he could not tell how long, Tony just knelt there, feeling nothing. But then a great warmth spread across him, and a woman appeared before him.</p><p>"Frigga?" Tony questioned. The woman bowed her head. "Your child, Loki, is innocent. I know he is. And he's pregnant, and Thor and the others hurt him and violate him and he thinks he deserves this. And he's so vulnerable, and weak, and he needs protecting. can't you help him, please. Your his only hope."</p><p>"Tony. You are a good person. And what happens to Loki pains me too, but there is nothing I can do. I have spoken to the Allfather, and the most he will agree to is that should Thor die you will be the next to take possession of him. I do not wish Thor dead, but short of killing him there is no way to free Loki. You must understand that I cannot kill my son." Frigga said, her voice pained.</p><p>Tony turned away from her. If Thor were to die, he would own Loki. He does not want that, of course not, but at least Loki would be safe. But Tony knew he was no match for Thor, he would just die. So silently, and hopelessly, Tony walks upstairs to join Loki.</p><p>Two minutes later, Tony is startled by a scream for help from Natasha.</p>
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<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Nemesis</h2></a>
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    <p>Loki heard Natasha scream and knew he could not just sit still. His hatred of the avengers may still burn rather strongly, the fire not extinguished by threat, but unlike the avengers Loki knew that even criminals deserved fair trials and human rights. He was bound not by slavery but by his morals to help them.</p><p>He sprinted out the bedroom and down the stairs. The journey had never felt so long, his feet collided with the floor and he felt the ground beneath him give way. He fell forward, rolling over to avoid breaking his neck. He gets to his feet and walks into the living room, wondering what on earth he can do.</p><p>The scene that meets his eyes is chaos. Natasha and Clint are bound by ropes. Bruce is surrounded by magic, frozen still. Steve lies on the floor, Loki can only presume he has been knocked unconscious. Tony stands to one side, unmoving and unsure. Thor is in the centre, a knife held to his throat by a woman. Her hair is wild. Her eyes are wild. Her outfit, a glowing scarlet, matches the blood on the knife.</p><p>As Loki watches, the woman pulls the blade backward in a sharp, fluid motion, and Thor falls to the ground. Loki knows Thor is dead before he hits the floor. He can tell by the way that his magic pulses through him, free of the bonds for just a fraction of a second. A great weight lifts from his shoulders. The bond settles again, and this time he knows he is bound to Tony. He can feel it in the way he moves, the way the bond has settled, the way Tony matters now.</p><p>Loki watches, held in place by shock, as the woman pulls Tony to him. He watches as Tony is drawn nearer, wrapped up in magic and drawn in like a fly caught in a spiders web, like a boat in a whirlpool. The woman raises her blade to Tony's throat.</p><p>"Do you know who I am, Tony Stark?" she questions. Tony shakes his head. "My name is Wanda. Wanda Maximoff. Although they call me Scarlett Witch. I hate you, Mr Stark. See the thing is, a while back, I was happy. Then a grenade killed my family. My parents, my brother, all dead. On that grenade was written Stark industries. You are my nemesis, Mr Stark. You are a monster. You and your team of heroes, walking about this world like Robin Hood, pretending you are saving us. We do not need saving by you, we need saving from you!"</p><p>Wanda pauses in her monologue for impact. Loki cannot move, cannot think, he is paralysed by fear and shock. She is right, but not about Tony. And he has to protect Tony. But without explicit permission, he cannot use his magic. He is worthless.</p><p>"You prance about like you are higher than the laws. You pretend you are Merlin when you are Morganna. You make weapons and you kill for profit. You sit on your wealth, using it to live a life of luxury, instead of feeding those who starve. You own slaves. You are al monsters dressed up as saviours. You are my, and all of earths, nemesis."</p><p>As she spoke, something hit Loki. He was not powerless, not useless. He may have no magic, but he still had one strength. He was still silver-tongue, and he still had his voice.</p><p>"Wanda, was that your name?" Loki asked shakily. "Wanda, please. If you know of the avengers keeping slaves then you must mean me. And Tony, he is the one guy who didn't treat me like a slave. He kept me safe. The others abused me, violated me, struck me down and mocked me, they are monsters. But Tony kept me safe. He protected me. He isn't a monster, not like the others. Please, you have to believe me. I love him!"</p><p>Wanda slowly dropped her magic and let Tony go.</p>
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<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Pedestal</h2></a>
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    <p>Tony rolled over and kissed Loki softly. "Are you ready Bambi?" he asked. Loki nodded and stood up. Together they walked downstairs.</p><p>After Wanda stopped her magical attack, everything had calmed right down. Loki and Tony had had the other avengers arrested, and they were all still awaiting trial, no doubt going to get a variety of sentences.</p><p>Tony was just glad the pain was over. Tony was glad he and Loki could begin to heal together. Tony was glad that he could finally bring some resemblance of normality back into the shape-shifters life. Together, they had begun to heal. And now was the day when Tony and Loki would meet their new team, the new avengers.</p><p>These last few weeks had been idly spent. Tony and Loki had done little, they had spent days on end hanging around the tower, watching Harry Potter and Star Wars, eating pop corn and crisps. They had become teenagers over lock-down. They cared not for the fast paced life that sped by. But today, all that would change.</p><p>Tony looked around the living room with an element of curiosity. He made sure to not allow the others to see his curiosity, instead gazing around at the group before him. "I'm Tony. Tony Stark. Also known as Iron man. I'm the leader. And this is Loki." he said, nudging Loki.</p><p>"I'm Scarlet witch." Wanda says, and the others chime in with introductions.</p><p>"I'm wolverine."</p><p>"Black Panther. Pleasure to meet you."</p><p>"Spiderman."</p><p>"Ant-man."</p><p>"I'm not one of you, I'm just Peter's girlfriend. You can call me Mary-Jane, or MJ. I wouldn't be here except Peter needed a baby sitter."</p><p>Tony smirked as Peter face palmed. He could practically feel Loki cringing next to him. The atmosphere was far from easy, the tension in the room fault overwhelming.</p><p>"Ah, Peter, my sympathies. Sometimes I fear Loki thinks I need a babysitter. he's probably right, to be honest. I only fear what will happen when he grows bored of me like everyone else. Everyone seems to stick me on a pedestal, and at some point, the pedestal crashes down and they see that I'm a dick. One day, I know he won't want to be my baby sitter."</p><p>"That day will never come, I can assure you." Loki says, flushing deep red.</p><p>"Yeah. We all know your reputation. Perhaps this time you'll manage to keep with him. Perhaps your love is written in the stars." Wolverine says, heavy sarcasm marring his voice.</p><p>"No one can rewrite the stars." Mary-Jane says softly.</p><p>It was much later when they were finally alone, that Loki shocked Tony.</p><p>"Will you marry me?" Loki asks. His hand is on his stomach, and he is kneeling down.</p><p>"Really? You want this? Are you sure?" Tony asked, shocked.</p><p>"Of course I'm sure. I want you to be my eternity. I love you, and I want to prove that to you. You will always be on my pedestal. I will always love you." Loki says, standing up, letting out a slight moan. Tony feels slightly guilty, he should not have let his pregnant partner kneel down.</p><p>"Yes. I will marry you." Tony says, standing up. He pulls Loki into a hug.</p><p>"And Tony, I looked through the baby name book. How about Alex?" Loki asks.</p><p>"I like Alex. Its certainly better than Fenrir." Tony says smiling.</p><p>Tony raised a glass of water into the air. "To Alex. To marriage. To love, and devotion. To a healthy and happy relationship. To freedom and joy."</p><p>The end</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>So this is the end for now. I may write a sequel. Would anyone be interested in a sequel?</p>
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